Wow! Four years since my last post. I’ve been busy.

Luke the Physician records the following in Chapter 18:16-17 of his gospel writings:

But Jesus called for them, saying, “Permit the children to come to Me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all.” (NASB)

Our congregation is blessed with saints from every generation. One of our values is Intergenerational Ministry, that is all generations spending a majority of time together sharing our faith with each other.  That is not to say we don’t have age appropriate classes. However, we have a large number of adults that participate in our Children’s Ministry for cradle roll through 5th grade. Our Sunday and Wednesday morning Children’s classes are unique in this area, in that we have our pre-schoolers through 5th grade meet together on Sunday Mornings to sing songs and then hear a lesson from a “story teller”, which rotates among several adults in the congregation. Then our kids go to their classes to review their memory verses and have activities designed to reinforce the day’s lesson. Wednesday Night’s involve a repeat of time together and reinforcing, age-appropriate activities. It is like VBS every Sunday!

The beauty of Intergenerational Ministry is how each generation helps build or boost the faith of the others. We tend to only think in terms of the older teaching the young, sharing our knowledge, experience, and wisdom to help them grow, and this is healthy and necessary.  However, we can tend toward cynicism as we age, or apathy, or any number of unhealthy attributes if our priorities are not rooted in God, His Word, and His mission for us. Our kids can remind us of the innocence, grace, trust, energy, and excitement we either still have or at some point did have when it came to being a child of God.

It is with this in mind that one Sunday morning our assembly ended with a focus on our kids. We have a large number of kids of all ages, over 80 about three years ago the last time I counted. We are probably over 100 now. I thought I would share the following prayer from a while back that we prayed over them at the end of a particular assembly:

Our Father in Heaven, Creator of all life, Redeemer of all mankind,

We pray your blessings fall like Spring rain on our children here before you now, and we pray you will bless this church family’s efforts to grow their faith in You and Your Word.

We pray we raise them to have the reverence of Noah, the faith of Abraham, the trust of Isaac, the perseverance of Jacob, the integrity of Joseph. To be as passionate as the prophets, and committed as the apostles and followers of Jesus.

We pray that with your blessings we raise young men who will lead like Moses, fight for the faith like Joshua, with hearts like David, and wisdom like Solomon.

Help us Heavenly Father to raise young women worthy of proverbs, loyal like Sarah, devoted like Ruth, and courageous as Esther.

We pray Lord that just as you entrusted your own child to the care of Mary and Joseph, that we fulfill the same trust you place in us to inspire the next generation of the church, with humble servants full of grace, wise leaders, and loving brothers and sisters, sons and daughters, fathers and mothers. We pray we raise them to one day be our teachers and ministers, shepherds and deacons, ministers, evangelists, and missionaries.

And Father, most of all, help us raise them to love. To love You, Your Son, and the Holy Spirit. To love the Church, the body of Christ and His bride, with the same passion, zeal, and fire in their hearts and souls as that of our First Century brothers and sisters.

Help us Lord to teach and model for our kids what it means to love their enemies as well as their friends. To love sinners and to love saints. And to love their neighbors and the communities where they live.

We thank you Father for these young blessings here before the congregation. We thank you for the awesome responsibility you have given us. We thank you for answering our prayers and wee thank you for your Son, the savior and redeemer of us, your children, and these, our children.

And it is in His name we pray,

Amen

I hope this prayer is encouraging to you and something you can use in the future to pray over your own congregation’s kids. They are worth it.

Blessings,
Don

Now it came about after the death of Moses the servant of the Lord, that the Lord spoke to Joshua the son of Nun, Moses’ servant , saying, “Moses My servant is dead; now therefore arise, cross this Jordan, you and all this people, to the land which I am giving to them, to the sons of Israel.” – Joshua 1:1-2 (NASB)

In the military, after conducting a mission we have an After Action Review (AAR). The purpose for the review is to reflect on what was planned, what happened, what went well, and what to improve for the next mission.  The AAR is usually done in both a group setting and then followed up with a written report.

Great leaders of the Bible have followed similar practices, though not necessarily in the exact same format. Before Moses and Joshua died they recounted the history of Israel, warned against apostasy, and blessed the Israelites (Deuteronomy 31-33, Joshua 24).  Their words were recorded and shared for the generations to come.

Our congregation in Castle Rock follows a similar practice. For the past three years we have published an annual report. It contains statistics and stories about our congregation for the previous year and provides insight into the year to come.  We release the Annual Report in late January or early February on the same date one of our elders addresses the congregation about the report’s contents and our plans for the year.

I have had the honor of writing the Introduction to the Annual Report all three years. It is something I enjoy doing.  I thought since I had not posted anything for months I would post the introductory letter, as our Annual Report is too long to include in my blog. To provide context, the letter below addresses the first year of our congregation’s three year focus for spiritual growth encapsulated in the words Belong, Become, Bless (which we call the 3Bs).  Last year we were focused on Belong, which is how we describe the first stage of spiritual growth.  I don’t expect this introduction to mean much to you personally, but thought it was worth sharing if for no other reason than to stimulate some thought. So, here is the letter:

Hello Family.

BELONG. BECOME. BLESS. The “3 Bs”: three simple words, one meaningful journey through the stages of spiritual growth. Last year we invited you to help us continue growing by joining us in our journey. What you hold in your hands is a summary of our first year of that journey.

While all the stages of spiritual growth overlap and none are independent, 2015 was a year focused on what it means to BELONG. Each “B” means something different to everyone, and all of us are in a different stage depending on the practical teaching we received, the private disciplines we practiced, the pivotal circumstances we experienced, and the providential relationships we encountered.

Several families determined BELONG meant they wanted to be a part of the Castle Rock congregation. Seven individuals were convicted to BELONG by having their sins washed away in baptism and added to the Church. As a result, on any given Sunday in 2015 our average attendance increased to 230, more than 50% of our average attendance took the opportunity to join our House to House (H2H) ministry, there are kids everywhere, and we surpassed our one-time attendance record set in 2014 by 31.  In a time where other congregations are stagnant or even shrinking, it is a blessing to BELONG to a growing congregation here at Castle Rock.

While we celebrate the blessings of last year, we should be asking ourselves what else we can do to BELONG in 2016. We already offer multiple ministries where you can BELONG, from H2H, to the Children’s Ministry, Leadership Training for Christ (LTC), Encouragement, Meals, and Quilting to name a few. Additionally, as a congregation, we will give families reasons to BELONG. First, we will start the year off with a parenting seminar at the end of January in partnership with Focus on the Family. Then, this summer we will host another family seminar. Finally, this spring, our goal is to start the Upwards Sports program in our community to provide a place where our kids can BELONG to a faith-based sports league and we can introduce our congregation to families desiring the same for their children. This program will need coaches, referees, supporting staff, and participants to be a success. Maybe you see a different need or desire to BELONG in a different capacity. Whatever it is, we pray in 2016 you will decide to BELONG not just to the Castle Rock congregation, but to one of our ministries, programs, or special events as well.

Also, as you read our 3^rd Annual Report and reflect on the blessings of last year and the focus on BELONG, we ask that you consider the year ahead as our journey progresses from BELONG to BECOME, and what that means to you. Our goal is for all of us to grow and “BECOME Christ-like”. We have the leadership, staff (including a remarkable new Associate Minister and his wife), preaching, teaching, ministries, and are working toward the organization necessary to achieve our goal. We only need two more things – God’s continued favor and you. Won’t you join us?

Grace, peace, and love to you all.

DEM

It is a trustworthy statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer , it is a fine work he desires to do. An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but gentle, peaceable, free from the love of money. He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity (but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?), and not a new convert, so that he will not become conceited and fall into the condemnation incurred by the devil. And he must have a good reputation with those outside the church, so that he will not fall into reproach and the snare of the devil. – 1 Timothy 3:1-7 (NASB)

I had a successful Army career. There were times I was exceptional, there were times I was ranked among the best of my peers, but overall I was successful. I was always promoted with my peers, reached the rank of Lieutenant Colonel, served 21 years, and retired honorably. I was also well-liked by my superiors, peers, and subordinates for the bulk of my military service. Most of all, I was known as someone that would get things done, an important trait in the military where your mission was your priority. I was a task oriented officer.

I took that same task-orientation with me to my next supervisory job after the military. It is something that differentiates me from my current supervisor. During a recent conversation he freely admitted he was a “people person” and that is what had gotten him to the position he is in today. He also freely admitted he struggles with being driven by tasks and a calendar, which is exactly the opposite of me. Later I reflected on the conversation and what it said about me as a shepherd for a congregation of God’s people.

A quick review of an elder’s character in 1 Timothy and Titus reveals what God is looking for is a relational shepherd (this is where you state the proverbial “duh”). While I don’t believe either of these passages is the complete picture of a shepherd, they are definitely a good summation and good start point. So what is the implication for someone like me that is task oriented?

First, I don’t believe it is an either/or situation when considering if you are task or people oriented. It is more a matter of what is your default. I serve with three other elders and two ministers. One elder is definitely people oriented, two of us are more task oriented, and one is the most balanced with both skill sets. Likewise, one of our ministers is mostly task oriented while the other is definitely a people person. Of course all of us are more complex, but again I am addressing our defaults. My default is always the task – what process needs started, what problem needs solved, what document needs written, etc. That is not to say I do not have the ability to show the love, compassion, empathy, sympathy, affirmation, grace, forgiveness, and other feelings toward others. It is to say that I have to work on being a “people person”. In other words, it does not come naturally to me.

So what is a shepherd that is task oriented to do about becoming more people oriented, or vice-versa?

First, pray about it. The Bible is full of examples of people allowing God to work in them to make them into so much more than they started. God can do the same for you.

Second, if you are task oriented then us it as a skill to help you improve your people orientation. If you are driven by the calendar, to-do lists, and other task oriented tools then use them to schedule time with people. For example, my work schedule has changed and I now work during the evenings into late at night. So that frees my mornings to schedule coffee, brunch, or lunch dates with those I want or need to spend time with so we can improve our relationships, our skills, and our ministries. Be sure to schedule time with someone that is people oriented, for by talking with them and watching them you can’t help but improve your people skills if you really want to do so.

Third, if you are people oriented then find someone task oriented to hold you accountable for completing tasks. Odds are you won’t want to disappoint them, so ask them to help you keep your schedule and ask them to remind you to do your part in whatever group task that needs accomplishing. Since they are task oriented there is a good chance they will schedule a time to follow-up with your accountability. This way each one of you is getting to exercise your strengths to make the other one better (talk about a win-win for both of you!).

Well, now that I have completed my task of resuming writing my blog, I hope it helps in some small way to help you become a better shepherd and to complete the “task” you so earnestly desired.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM

“And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ.” – Ephesians 4:11-13 (NASB)
The company I work for has what they call a “one voice” policy. That is to say, if you are asked a question about the company by an outside entity other than customers, you are to refer them to the corporate public relations department. The purpose of the one voice policy is to protect the brand name of the company and to protect those that work there by providing a way of escape before being trapped into making a compromising statement about yourself, your co-workers, or the company as a whole.
During my Army career we had something similar. If the media was ever objective in its reporting, that time has long past. The media is a business, and they are not there to tell the facts. They are there to make sales. The more they can stir your emotions, the more they can get you to make “impulse buys” of their particular side to a story. So, while not as restrictive as the one voice policy described above, we underwent extensive training on how to interact with outside entities, particularly the media, along with which topics we could discuss and which topics we couldn’t. They were called talking points.
The idea of oneness, sameness, and unity abounds in Scripture. Our Lord and Savior prayed for it (John 17:23), the early church practiced it (Acts 2:46), and the epistles exhort it. Depending on how you read it, Ephesians 4 alone has up to 12 direct references to the idea of “one” or unity.
We all understand the idea behind unity and oneness in the body. As shepherds of the flock, we have to always be on guard for a lack of unity within the flock. Our minister, Dr. Matthew Morine, is fond of reminding us of the 1/3 rule. The 1/3 rule means no matter what you do 1/3 will like it, 1/3 will dislike it, and 1/3 could care less one way or the other. This becomes quite apparent when you try to implement a change that is scriptural but does not fit the traditional norm. Usually in such instances the 1/3 that dislikes it will become very vocal about their displeasure and find ways to try and bind tradition as scriptural fact, despite evidence and logical conclusions to the contrary.
Another action the 1/3 that dislikes a change will take is to attempt to triangulate the eldership. Instead of voicing their concerns to the eldership as a whole, they will find the elder they are most comfortable approaching, or the one they think will be most sympathetic to their opinions, or the one that is least equipped to deal with stress, tension, or conflict, and just “throw up” all their anxiety all over that one elder. Typically, the anxiety they espouse is filled with dire warnings of what will happen if a change is made and their predetermined resulting additional changes that will come if this newest change is implemented.
The purpose behind triangulating an elder is to make sure that elder is so overwhelmed that he forgets the 1/3 rule and assigns the unrest to the entire congregation instead of the vocal 1/3 it actually to whom it applies. Once this happens, the elder is convinced the best decision for the “whole” congregation is not to implement the change, even though in reality he has only heard from 1/3 of the members. This is an especially easy decision to make if the elder is already sympathetic to the opinions of the disliking 1/3. Then the elder uses his conclusion as the basis for arguing against the change when it is time for the eldership to make a final decision on the wisest course of action.
When the disliking 1/3 triangulates an elder they are demonstrating a disregard for Ephesians 4:1-3. To be fair, they are probably operating from pure motives. They are concerned for the congregation. They don’t want to see their leaders make unwise decisions. However, seldom do their concerns address what the Scriptures say as much as their concerns address their personal opinions and comfort levels. Moreover, seldom do their concerns address unity, other than to say they are not united enough to give the change an honest chance of working, nor are they united enough behind their leaders to trust their concerns will be considered but in the end the leaders will make decisions they feel will have the best interest of the entire congregation in mind, and not just any 1/3 of it.
If you don’t believe what I am saying, I challenge you to test it by making a change. For instance, try ending a long-running ministry or changing the long-running order of worship. It doesn’t matter that the ministry has run its course, doesn’t matter it is not bearing fruit, and doesn’t matter that not even 1/3 of the congregation is involved with it. Just try ending it and see if triangulation doesn’t start happening. It also doesn’t matter that it makes more sense to move the offering to particular time during the assembly. If it is different, if it is a change, you are going to hear about it. So, what do you do when (not if) this happens?
First, allow enough time before the change to inform the congregation about the change. Raise awareness about the proposed change and let them know the reasons behind the change. Second, create desire for the change. Not a desire based on preferences, but a desire based on the benefits, both to members as well as guests. It is hard to argue with a change that will lead to more evangelistic opportunities. Next you want to spend time raising their level of knowledge about the change. You want to spend time reassuring them the change does not violate Scripture. Then give the congregation the ability to implement the change by resourcing the change and involving influential members in the change. Finally, after some time, review the change and see if it is bearing fruit. If it isn’t, then admit as much. If it is bearing fruit then run with it and just tweak the change as you go. In other words, lead through the change. This all sounds great, and I have seen it work. However, what do you do if you mess this process up?
First, remember if you are in an eldership you do not have your own voice. When I joined the Army I voluntarily relinquished certain rights, one of them being the right to free speech. The same could be said of the eldership. When you agreed to serve as one of the shepherds of a congregation, you voluntarily relinquished the right to express your own personal opinion about matters. Be aware that if you say something, you are perceived as speaking for the eldership. Also be aware that if you express your personal opinion to any of the 1/3 that you are creating potential for disunity in the eldership if you haven’t discussed the concerns and agreed upon what the eldership will decide and what the eldership will say about the matter. By all means express your personal opinions with your fellow elders and allow them to express theirs. However, you must present a unified message and decision to the congregation or you will end up increasing disunity in the congregation. Also, before you say anything to your fellow elders, consider if you are expressing your opinion or the opinion of any one of the 1/3s. Additionally, if you allow yourself to be influenced by any of the 1/3 because of how vocal they are, and if you say something supporting their opinions to them without discussing it with your fellow elders, you have overstepped your bounds as a shepherd and made a de facto decision for the eldership without discussing it with them first.
I pray your congregation is united. I pray your eldership is united. I pray you don’t fall into the trap of triangulation as you shepherd your congregations to glorify God by creating contagious faith that fulfills the Great Commission.
May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.
-DEM

Then Joshua the son of Nun, the attendant of Moses from his youth, said, “Moses, my lord, restrain them.” – Numbers 11:28 (NASB)

The stories of Moses and Joshua are my Old Testament favorites. Their lives are rich with leadership lessons. I feel the verse above is often overlooked when looking at the larger context of the situation where Eldad and Medad are prophesying in the camp while 70 elders had positioned themselves around the Tabernacle and were also prophesying. What grabs my attention from this verse is the phrase “the attendant of Moses from his youth”. The verse screams at us to start building leadership depth at the earliest opportunity.

One of the challenges we face in our congregation is leadership depth. We have broken the 200 barrier, but it still pulls at us like a spacecraft that is breaking Earth’s gravity barrier. We are an awkward size, just past too large for a small congregation, too small to be a large congregation with the inherent resources. At our size we are faced with the challenge of developing enough depth in our leadership so as not to burn anyone out and provide redundancy, but we do not have a large population pool from which to draw. There also exists the constant friction between doing several good things or a few great things. We have determined it is best to have leadership depth in a few great things than leadership width in several things.

So how is a congregation in our situation supposed to build depth? Here are some practical ideas that work for us:

1) Invest in yourselves. I cannot stress enough the importance of investing in the elder / minister leadership team. We do so by conducting an annual elder / minister retreat to discuss the current condition of the congregation, the fruit of our ministries, what goals we did or did not accomplish, and to set a theme with direction for the next year. For several months during the year the first item on our recurring meeting agendas included our minister leading a short discussion on a book pertinent to our congregation. We partnered with an elder and minister from a larger congregation to pick their brains on how to grow, what growing pains they encountered, how they dealt with the pains, and so on. We are intentional in our personal leadership development and seek to develop the depth of our leadership abilities.

2) Invest in your current leaders.

(a) Last October we held a leadership retreat in Colorado’s Rocky Mountains. We were far enough away to remove ourselves from the distractions of being close to home, but close enough the drive was not a burden. We had beautiful weather, which is no guarantee in mid-late October at 9,000 feet elevation. Maybe the Lord felt our undertaking was worthy of the blessing. We asked our most creative elder to plan the retreat. Prior to the retreat we spent hours determining who to invite. We knew we would not be able to invite everyone, we knew some invitees would not be able to make the retreat, and we wanted to start small because we had never done anything like this before. It was a helpful exercise to go through a multitude of names and discuss if they were leading in some capacity within the congregation. I’m not talking about just your deacons (that is a given). I am talking about others in your congregation that initiate structure, influence others to accomplish Kingdom work, and just plain get things done. It was interesting to hear from some of those we did invite and how they felt they never saw themselves as leaders and wondered why they were invited. We identified a guest speaker from a congregation larger than ours so we could have the perspective of a large congregation leader during the retreat. We determined our theme would be from the book of Nehemiah (another amazing case study in leadership) and shared that with the guest speaker as well as several pages of notes from our annual elder / minister retreat, including our theme and spiritual framework for the coming year, which our guest speaker worked in to his lessons quite well. Our elder leading the effort built an itinerary of lessons, fellowship, meals, and fun activities which strengthened relationships among the group. Almost to a person, the group expressed it was a rewarding weekend. We felt it was a great “Return on Investment”.

(b) We invest in our current leaders is through delegation. Not just delegating actions, but delegating decision making. When we spent time picking the brains of the leaders from a larger congregation we determined we should adopt their decision making guidelines for our deacons and ministry points of contact. We give our leaders their budget for the year. We ask our leaders to consult with us before making a decision if they are going to bust their budget, if they are going to make a decision that with challenge a traditional norm, or if they are going to make a decision that could be interpreted as a doctrinal issue. Then we ask our leaders to make decisions under all other conditions and not to bring everything to us for the final say, but rather to inform us what decisions they have made. We are not perfect at this yet, but we are improving across the congregation.

(c) We invest in our leaders by providing an environment for them to grow. One example is our small group ministry which we call House to House. We seek out hosts and facilitators with the intention of placing them in charge of a House to House gathering and leading that ministry in their homes and in their discussion. This is proving to be one of the most fruitful ministries and environments for leadership growth in our congregation.

3) Invest in your future leaders. When my family first visited our congregation a little over five years ago, one of the qualities we liked was the involvement the elders had with the youth group. They sought to build deep relationships with the youth, just as Moses apparently did with Joshua. We continue that tradition. We installed an elder who was also the best youth deacon I’ve ever seen and he maintains that connection with our youth group. Once every two to three years we try to have an elder / teen retreat to strengthen the relationships between us and our youth and demonstrate they are important to us. We also stress their involvement in congregational activities and strive to keep them involved and integrated in the entire congregation and not limit them to teen / youth only activities, such as when the elders conduct a quarter’s worth of classes simultaneously for a mix of teens and adults in the same classroom. We have even expanded most of this approach to create a demographically based ministry we call Gen Faith (short for Generation Faith), which means those in their first few years of adulthood, whether single or married. Like Moses, we are concerned about the congregation now and take a long term view of the leaders of the Church in the next couple of generations.

These are just some ideas. It is definitely not an all-inclusive list, but maybe you will find it beneficial, thought provoking, and give you the opportunity to reflect on what you are doing to build leadership depth into your congregation, especially if you are still close to the 2oo barrier. I pray it helps.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM

Masters, grant to your slaves justice and fairness, knowing that you too have a Master in heaven. – Colossians 4:1 (NASB) 

You might be wondering what the title of this post and the scripture have in common. I hope to make that clear by the end of the post.

Like the Centurion in Luke 7, in all my years of military service there was never any question who had the authority in a meeting. Whether it was a Command and Staff meeting, Training meeting, Commander’s Update Brief, or myriad of other meetings, we always knew who was chairing the meeting and who had the final say about anything brought up.  Sometimes, I was the final say.  Most of the time, the final say rested with one of my superiors.

This is not the case in a congregation that does not have elders. I have nothing against congregations without elders when they are treating everyone fairly.  I grew up in the Church and have spent about half of my life in congregations without elders.  However, that was not by choice.  Almost always it was a matter of location.  Growing up in rural Arkansas and some of my military assignments meant I was going to worship in a congregation without elders.  Having seen both sides of the coin, I much preferred the congregations with elders over the others.  After all, congregations with elders more closely fit the Biblical pattern for the Church than those without do.

My clearest early memories of my time in the Church are from my days in rural Arkansas. We moved to a small congregation of about 30 where my brother and I made up the youth group and my parents were the next youngest in the congregation.  I am sure you can guess the age of the congregation from those two clues.  I found out after being in the congregation a short time that two of the men there pretty much ran the congregation.  They had determined it was unscriptural to eat in the building and everyone else just went along.  Guess it was just as well we couldn’t eat in the building since we didn’t have a fellowship hall or anything like it.  All we had was an auditorium , two small classrooms, and a baptistry.  However, even if we had a fellowship area these two men had already determined it would not be used for a good old fashioned potluck or any other type of meal.

Fast forward almost 30 years. I recently heard of a small rural congregation firing their preacher.  They fired him for an incident that was two months old, that the preacher had confessed to the congregation and asked for forgiveness about, and supposedly had been forgiven.  The background is the congregation does not have the means to support a full time minister.  So the preacher supplemented his income with other work and he had found a cleaning position at the local assisted living facility.  Apparently, a room had not been cleaned properly and there was a confrontation between him and other workers are the facility as to who was to blame.  The preacher lost his temper and was fired.  The preacher went before the congregation, confessed he lost his temper, and asked for their forgiveness.  End of story, right?  Not so fast.

Enter the part time member who is a bully and a loud mouth. This part time member finds out about the two month old incident through gossip in town.  I guess the part timer wasn’t in attendance when the preacher confessed two months earlier.  This part time member doesn’t go to the preacher to find out what happened.  Instead, he stirs up other members of the congregation and wants the preacher fired, for the sake of “the churches reputation” of course.  Then, the part time member is given the opportunity to voice his accusations during a men’s meeting.  He is the loud mouth in the room and has garnered enough support that the men agree to fire the preacher.  Then, to top it off, while the preacher is held accountable for his actions the loud mouth who listened to the gossip and stirred up the congregation is not held accountable for such activity.  Where is the fairness in that?

I do not have all the details so I am not going to say whether it was right or wrong to fire the preacher. What I am going to say is the process was wrong and I am wondering who actually has the authority to fire the preacher in this case?  I find no scriptural authority given to these men to fire the preacher.  If anything, the preacher had more authority (see Eph 4:11+, Titus, and 1 Timothy).  At best they had the same secular authority as an employer has with an employee.  If they had made their decision to fire him on secular grounds of performance it would have been one thing.  However, they didn’t.  They fired the preacher to “protect the reputation of the church”.  Protect what reputation?  Was it the reputation of being a loving and forgiving congregation?  Apparently not.  Was it the reputation of a vibrant, growing congregation? Hardly.  The congregation hasn’t grown in the seven-plus years I’ve known about it.  No, in the end the preacher was fired because the loud mouth in the room was given equal time, even though he didn’t give of himself full time to the congregation.  The fact is, many of the members decided they didn’t like the preacher and if it hadn’t been for this reason then they eventually would have found some other reason to fire him.

Interestingly enough, this same congregation had the opportunity to hire someone else for the job before hiring the preacher they just fired. This someone else was probably more qualified.  He submitted a resume that had a couple of misspellings.  This was an automatic disqualifier for a member of the congregation who wrote a weekly article for the local paper in the next larger community.  After all, they couldn’t hire someone that might write an article for the paper with misspellings in it!  Another fine example of loud mouth leadership.  Funny thing is, instead of preaching for this congregation the candidate went on to do missionary and evangelical work for the kingdom and for a children’s home the congregation that didn’t hire him financially supported, all because of a loud mouth.

Contrast this with the council at Jerusalem in Acts 15. There, the equivalent of the loud mouths (the converted Pharisees) were trying to require the Gentile converts requirements to keep the Laws of the old covenant, even though the Jews themselves could not keep them perfectly.  However, it is clear to me that these loud mouth Pharisee converts did not have the authority to make that call, but that the decision rested with the elders and apostles (v. 6).  Who knows where we would be today if God had not put in place the leadership roles necessary to make such an important decision?

I am blessed in that I serve with no loud mouth elders or ministers. Maybe you are not as blessed, but I hope you are.  If you are not, I ask you to examine your congregation and determine if you are giving to much credence to the loud mouths.  My experience has been that loud mouth leadership is seldom good leadership.  It can give voice to those with the least amount of themselves invested in the congregation, those with very little if any “skin in the game”.  If you do have a loud mouth or two to deal with, I recommend you do so and do it quickly.  You can minimize their influence by finding ways to not give them a voice, such as restructuring meeting times and topics.  Or maybe you need to meet with the loud mouth separately and let them know they are not setting the direction of the congregation nor do they have the authority to do so, in a loving way of course.  If you need to do something about it, I recommend you do it quickly.  It will make your lives as leaders easier in the end.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM

When we came in sight of Cyprus, leaving it on the left, we kept sailing to Syria and landed at Tyre; for there the ship was to unload its cargo.  After looking up the disciples, we stayed there seven days; and they kept telling Paul through the Spirit not to set foot in Jerusalem. When our days there were ended, we left and started on our journey, while they all, with wives and children, escorted us until we were out of the city. After kneeling down on the beach and praying, we said farewell to one another.  Then we went on board the ship, and they returned home again. When we had finished the voyage from Tyre, we arrived at Ptolemais, and after greeting the brethren, we stayed with them for a day.     –Acts 21:3-7 (NASB) 

It is a military tradition to conduct a Hail and Farewell on a routine basis.  These events were especially common in my first 15 years of service as I progressed through the ranks from Lieutenant to Major.  It was a time to welcome new members to the unit and to say farewell and honor the deeds done by the departing Soldier and, if he had one, his family.

I was reminded of this tradition on two separate occasions in the life of our congregation recently.  The first occasion was when we said farewell to a family that had been part of our congregation for more than 20 years.  It seems their work here is done for now and God wants them to use their talents elsewhere for a while.  This was no long-time “pew warmer” family.  No, this was a family of disciples.  The wife and mother of the family had grown up in the congregation.  She and her husband had married in the old building.  Their kids grew up in the congregation, with one of them graduating this past May and the other two in their high school years.  He was our Missions Deacon and led both our local outreach ministry and out of state or out of country missions ministry.  For the most part, all we had to do was give him a budget, show up when he needed us, and champion his work.  He took care of the rest.  His wife was a stalwart example of a Christian wife and mother.  If the family was in town then their kids were at every youth and every other congregational event you could imagine.  They left us with many memories, a huge hole to fill, a legacy of service, and a level of community involvement not seen in the congregation before.  In fact, one of the community involvement events is the annual county parade, which we will participate in this weekend for the fourth year in a row.

I think we can all agree it is important to recognize the service in the kingdom of our brothers and sisters who move on.  Our differences center around how we honor their service.  Since I do not know how you honor the servants you labor with, I will share how we honor ours.

In the past our congregation was small enough we would have had a congregational fellowship and farewell meal for the family.  However, God has blessed us with growth to the point that we cannot honor everyone in this way.  Our congregation is in one of the fastest growing communities and counties in the country.  We are a transient congregation because a large part of our congregation is made up of the young professional working class that is better off than much of the country.  They work for companies and corporations and move where the job sends them.  These factors combine to make it difficult to try and honor everyone leaving with their own event.  Instead, if possible we bring those leaving up in front of the congregation on one of their last Sunday’s with us and say a pray asking for God’s blessings to flow on them as they continue his work elsewhere.  We rely on our small group ministry (which we call House to House or H2H) to honor those leaving on a more personal level since they have formed deeper relationships.  In the case of the family I mentioned earlier, they were honored twice in H2H.  First, their teens were honored in the teen group and then the parents were honored in their H2H group.  In many ways, this way of honoring our moving members is much more effective and personal than any congregational fellowship could ever be.

The second event reminding me of the military’s Hail and Farewell tradition occurred the same month, a couple of weeks later.  We had three families express their desire to be numbered with the saints in our congregation and join us in God’s work in the community.  Our tradition is for my fellow shepherds and me to meet with those expressing said desire, and we try to do so before we announce from the pulpit they have joined us.  This pre-announcement meeting (which admittedly happens after the fact sometimes) is an opportunity for us to match names with faces and families, introduce ourselves and our backgrounds, and to all around share in a time of discovering how we all ended up at the same place and time.  We like to take the meeting and find out where our new members would like to serve the congregation so we can put them in contact with the right folks.  We also take this time to encourage our new members to get involved in H2H if they have not done so already.  Although, we have found most new members are already involved in H2H and it is one of the factors in their choosing our congregation in which to serve.  I look forward to these meetings for many reasons and we have been told many times by those we are meeting with how much they appreciate it.

I hope your congregation has some “Hail and Farewell” method of its own.  If not, I encourage you to do so.  Maybe some of what you read here will inspire ideas of your own on how to honor both those leaving and joining the work in your congregation.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM

Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to exercise them accordingly: if prophecy, according to the proportion of his faith; if service, in his serving; or he who teaches, in his teaching; or he who exhorts, in his exhortation; he who gives, with liberality ; he who leads , with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness.   –Romans 12:6- 8 (NASB)

In my last post I discussed considering the roles and gifts each shepherd plays in the eldership. In this post I wanted to share with you my thoughts and experiences over the past three years in the eldership regarding the gifts and roles of others in the congregation.

In times past we have struggled to get the right people, with the right gifts, in the right roles. I imagine many of you, like us, have been in a congregation where there was a need, there was someone scripturally qualified to fill that need, and you asked them to serve that need and they accepted. Things go okay for a while as you wait for this person to fill the expectations you, they, and everyone else had for filling that need. Then you notice things are not going well, the ministry is not bearing fruit, and you wonder what is happening and what to do about it. You meet with the member you asked to fill the need, and find out they are not happy and do not feel suited for the role you have asked them to fill. Now what?

We had a similar experience a couple of years ago. We had a need because one of our deacons was not able to continue serving the table he had been serving for years. He no longer had the time to dedicate to the ministry due to work schedules and the need to focus on his family. So we asked someone with experience in that same role to fill the gap and they did. However, he didn’t enjoy the role and though he had done it in the past, he did not feel well suited to continue serving in this capacity. We met, discussed it, and then we asked the new deacon where he felt his gifts lie and what was his passion. Once we had the discussion, we identified a need that he could fill. The need was an new annual initiative, and the deacon fulfilled it beautifully. In fact, beyond what we imagined. We determined it was more important for our congregation and this deacon to serve a ministry based on his gifts instead of what we felt were our needs. The result was more than we hoped for, and God blessed us with others that had a passion for the other ministry the deacon was no longer serving. Now both ministries are bearing fruit, all because we figured out not to fill a need with someone without the gift. It was a long time getting there, but we eventually came to the right conclusion and God blessed us for it.

We often speak of people’s gifts and how they can serve the Kingdom with them. However, how often do we sit back and take a long look at our ministries to make sure the right people, with the right gifts, are serving in them? I hope you come to this conclusion long before we did, and are able to adapt more quickly than we were in this instance. If you do, don’t be surprised if God doesn’t fill your need with someone else that has the gifts needed and your other ministries begin bearing fruit as ours have done.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM

And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ. As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming; but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love. – Ephesians 4:11-16 (NASB)

As a combat veteran who has lost Soldiers, Memorial Day has a special meaning to me. One of my favorite things to do over the Memorial Day weekend is to watch war movies with my son. You may think this is odd for someone of my background, but the activity goes well beyond watching the movies. It is more about an activity that my son and I share and enjoy together and have done so almost every year I was home for the holiday from the time he was young(er).

One of the movies I really enjoy is The Great Escape. The movie is about a true event where British aviator prisoners broke out of a German World War II POW camp specially designed and staffed to prevent such an escape. One of my favorite things about the movie is how every character has a specific role. There was the “Tunnel King” responsible for supervising and digging the tunnels. There was the “Forger” responsible for providing escaping prisoners with papers needed to move about in Germany. There was the “Tailor” who manufactured escape clothes and disguises. There was the “Surveyor” who had to determine the best path and length of each tunnel. There are a host of other characters and roles as well. One of my other favorite things about the movies is how each one has to fulfill his role for the escape to be successful and each role depended on each person’s talents.

The idea of roles and gifts is not a new one, and it is definitely not a new one for the Church as mentioned in the verses above. In my last post I mentioned how we were blessed last year with numerical and spiritual growth and the blessings seem to be continuing. I believe one of the reasons we are experiencing the growth is because of how the elders and ministers in our leadership team fills a role based on our gifts. I serve with two other amazing elders as my shepherds and we each bring something different to the eldership. In addition to our responsibilities to shepherd God’s children, I am the organizational leader constantly struggling to figure out how to lead the organism known as the body of Christ. One of my fellow elders is both creative and organized and was the best Youth Deacon I have ever seen. If I am struggling with how to make something fun or creative, I go to him. My other elder is the quiet one and a “man of the people”. In a wealthy suburban mostly white-collar part of the world he brings us “Analogies from the Ranch” and the porch-step wisdom of the worldly man become saint. The three of us combined with our pulpit minister and another minister we are blessed with combine to make a pretty effective team, thanks to be to our Lord. It is as if we are indeed “being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part” as we try to serve His Church, our families, and our community.

I will leave you with some thoughts. Have you ever considered the gifts each one of you in your team brings to the roles you fill? Have you ever taken this into consideration along with our “checklist” of qualifications for elders when selecting new ones to serve? Is each individual working toward fitting and properly working together? My guess is if you are in a growing congregation then you are asking yourselves these questions frequently and probably doing much more.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM

What then is Apollos? And what is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, even as the Lord gave opportunity to each one. I planted, Apollos watered, but God was causing the growth. So then neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but God who causes the growth. Now he who plants and he who waters are one; but each will receive his own reward according to his own labor. For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field , God’s building. (NASB)

Fifteen months have passed since I last blogged. I have missed it. My blog up until now has been focused on the lessons I’ve learned and tried to apply to the role and concept of a Biblical shepherd. While that journey will never be complete, I am hoping to take this blog in a new direction, if only I can figure out how to do it. Stay tuned.

In the meantime, much has happened in those 15 months for me personally and publicly. I finished management training and am now an entry level manager with a national car company. My daughter finished her high school junior and senior years and will graduate this Thursday before attending university in the fall. My wife has been recognized as Nurse of the Year in her department. My son has completed EMT school. Both of my parents have been diagnosed with cancer and are undergoing treatment. We have moved to a larger home so we can host visitors to our congregation. And these are just the things that come to the top of my head. Many things have happened and God has been there every step of the way with us.

Something else that happened is both the numerical and spiritual growth in our congregation. We summarized the events of 2013 and published an annual report for the congregation so they too could see how they contributed to the work of the Kingdom. The report highlighted several accomplishments for Glorifying God over the year. Here are some examples.

Our Quilting Ministry distributed 20 quilts both locally and abroad. We revamped our Children’s Ministry to make it more like our VBS once a week. We established a milestone and involved entire families in our first Leadership Training for Christ (LTC) Convention. We held our bi-annual Teen-Elder Retreat, annual Youth Camping Trip, and a host of other fun and spiritually rewarding activities. We planned, prepared, and hosted our first area-wide Ladies’ Day in years. We spent the year becoming more deeply involved with God’s Word through our Book of the Year, the Gospel of Matthew, and more than half the congregation took advantage of our new House to House (H2H) Ministry (i.e. Small Groups) to grow closer together.

We participated in God’s mission to create disciples of all nations (Matthew 28:19-20) in our local community and the community of believers abroad. We had friends join us in our annual “flag” football game and get muddy at our annual luau, handed out over 2,000 water bottles during the Douglas County Parade, distributed 777 scarves and thousands of glow sticks at our booth at the Castle Rock Starlighting, and began our unique Brothers in Arms outreach. We supported missions around the world and in our own country from Angola, Belize, Guatemala, Scotland, France, and Mexico to Arizona and Michigan.

I firmly believe because of we were faithful in a few things that God is blessing us with more. The details above are just a portion of the fruits of our labor. As a result, in a time when many congregations are stagnant or declining God has blessed us with numerical growth, as our attendance grew from an average of 190 to 240, including 13 new Christians. We are also financially healthy in a day when many of our fellow congregations have to slash budgets. He blessed us with financial growth and your offerings made us financially healthy. You can feel the excitement in our worship assemblies which are alive with a positive momentum you can feel.

All of this is for naught if we forget the verses above which remind us it is God who gives us the increase. 2013 was an exciting year. So far 2014 continues along the same lines and we are striving to fulfill God’s vision for His Church, our families, and our community. If you haven’t done so or even if you already did, I invite you to reflect on God’s blessings for you and I pray they have been better than what I have experienced.

May your blessings exceed mine today and every day.

-DEM